#WriteWed – When Emotion Holds a Story Hostage

I don’t know about you, but I’ve had a story that’s been held hostage by my emotions for a very long time. It’s a story about me, my mom, and our family’s escape from Cuba. Every time I set down to write about it, I found myself being held back by the emotions that were inside me. Emotions that are still too raw even after decades of leaving Cuba and losing my mom.

But I know it’s a story that I need to tell almost as if by telling it the ghosts of that past and the pain associated with it will somehow disappear. It occurred to me that one way to get past the emotions holding me back is to write the story as if it wasn’t my story, but rather my characters’ story.

So I find myself laying out this new book that will be mostly about a woman disconnected from one part of her heritage, a man deeply connected to his heritage, and a grandmother desperate to reconnect with a part of her family that she’s lost.

In many ways, I can connect to the heroine and to the grandmother. For a while I had lost a big part of who I had been and had to fight to recover it and leave something of me for my daughter. In time I’ve given her a lot of that, but not all and I hope in time I can give her the rest.

As for this book, in part it is about sharing as much as I can about that story that’s been trapped by emotions. It’s about writing a story that all people will be able to connect to since it will be about getting over loss, finding oneself, and of course, finding love.

No title yet and no release date, but I’ll keep you posted!

#ThrowbackThursday Time to Leave . . .

I’ve always thought that you can’t know where you’re going, if you don’t acknowledge where you’ve been. For good or bad, every step in your life leaves a mark. Like in this picture. I’m pretty sure this is a photo of me for my passport when we were leaving Cuba. I must have been about 3 or so. My parents were already in the U.S. and my maternal grandparents were watching my sister and me. We were stuck in Cuba because the Castro regime had taken away our passports because my parents had left. Soldiers would come and harass the family regularly. My parents finally found a way to get us out and to get us in the U.S. It was a scary time in my life and I think it shows in this photo. I think inside of me there is still that scared little girl at times until the woman I’ve become rises up and reminds me that surviving all that has made me strong.

RIP Jose Fernandez

The shocking news came on while we were watching the Mets game last night. Cuban-American Jose Fernandez, who we feared as a competitor for the Miami Marlins, was dead at 24 in a boating accident.

Yoenis Cespedes, a fellow Cuban and Mets outfielder, hung up a Mets jersey with Fernandez’s name and number in tribute. Others followed suit all around the league.

Fernandez was voted the 2013 National League Rookie of the Year award. His was a promising life cut short, but it was a life of inspiration and as a fellow Cuban-American, it pained me to hear of his loss.

A Cuban-American sportscaster from Miami spoke about what Fernandez meant to the Cuban community, much like each and every successful Cuban resonates with Cubans all across the U.S.

We came here for freedom and to live the American dream. Fernandez embodied that spirit and attaining the dream.

At 14 he attempted to defect, but was caught and sent to prison. He tried again three other times and for each failure, he went to prison. During the successful attempt, Fernandez’s mother fell overboard and Fernandez had to rescue her, risking his own life to do so.

While Fernandez, his mother, and sister attained freedom here in the U.S. in 2007, his grandmother was left behind and it took six years before she could join her family in 2013. In 2015, Fernandez became a U.S. citizen.

Freedom was that important to Fernandez as it is to so many Cuban refugees who risked so much to get here. I understand. I lived it and have had the ability to attain the American Dream.

It’s why I stand and place my hand over my heart for the national anthem even when I’m at home and watching a game.

RIP Jose Fernandez. My sympathies to his family on their loss and to the families of the two other men killed in the boating accident.

José Fernández on April 12, 2016