Fun Friday – The Truth About Cats and Dogs

Many thanks to Melissa from the Dangerous Women Writing group for sharing this hilarious take on cats and dogs. If you want to join a fun loop, check us out! You can spend time with all the Dangerous Women Writing – Nina Bruhns, Anna DeStefano, Donna Grant, Michele Hauf, Jennifer Haymore/Dawn Halliday, Rita Herron, Caridad Pineiro, Debra Webb, and Lisa Renee Jones/Faith Winter!

You can join us by sending an e-mail to dangerouswomen-subscribe@yahoogroups.com.

So now for the truth about cats and dogs! Here are sample entries from cat and dog diaries.

Excerpts from a Dog’s Diary……

    8:00 am – Dog food! My favorite thing!
    9:30 am – A car ride! My favorite thing!
    9:40 am – A walk in the park! My favorite thing!
    10:30 am – Got rubbed and petted! My favorite thing!
    12:00 pm – Lunch! My favorite thing!
    1:00 pm – Played in the yard! My favorite thing!
    3:00 pm – Wagged my tail! My favorite thing!
    5:00 pm – Milk Bones! My favorite thing!
    7:00 pm – Got to play ball! My favorite thing!
    8:00 pm – Wow! Watched TV with the people! My favorite thing!
    11:00 pm – Sleeping on the bed! My favorite thing!

Excerpts from a Cat’s Daily Diary…

    Day 983 of my captivity…

    My captors continue to taunt me with bizarre little dangling objects. They dine lavishly on fresh meat, while the other inmates and I are fed hash or some sort of dry nuggets.

    Although I make my contempt for the rations perfectly clear, I nevertheless must eat something in order to keep up my strength.

    The only thing that keeps me going is my dream of escape. In an attempt to disgust them, I once again vomit on the carpet.

    Today I decapitated a mouse and dropped its headless body at their feet. I had hoped this would strike fear into their hearts, since it clearly demonstrates what I am capable of. However, they merely made condescending comments about what a ‘good little hunter’ I am. Bastards.

    There was some sort of assembly of their accomplices tonight. I was placed in solitary confinement for the duration of the event. However, I could hear the noises and smell the food. I overheard that my confinement was due to the power of ‘allergies.’ I must learn what this means and how to use it to my advantage.

    Today I was almost successful in an attempt to assassinate one of my tormentors by weaving around his feet as he was walking. I must try this again tomorrow — but at the top of the stairs.

    I am convinced that the other prisoners here are flunkies and snitches. The dog receives special privileges. He is regularly released – and seems to be more than willing to return. He is obviously retarded.

    The bird has got to be an informant. I observe him communicating with the guards regularly. I am certain that he reports my every move. My captors have arranged protective custody for him in an elevated cell, so he is safe. For now…………….

3 thoughts on “Fun Friday – The Truth About Cats and Dogs”

  1. Dangerous Women Writing group sounds like a lot of fun – thank you for the info. And the diary entries are so funny! Really enjoyed reading them. Have a nice week-end, Caridad!

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